{"id":30950,"date":"2023-08-28T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2023-08-27T18:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/gurudev.artofliving.org\/work\/uncategorized\/navigating-conflict-with-skillful-communication\/"},"modified":"2023-08-28T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2023-08-27T18:30:00","slug":"navigating-conflict-with-skillful-communication","status":"publish","type":"work","link":"https:\/\/gurudev.artofliving.org\/es\/work\/leadership-ethics\/navigating-conflict-with-skillful-communication\/","title":{"rendered":"Navigating Conflict with Skillful Communication"},"content":{"rendered":"<h6>August 23, 2023<\/h6>\n<p><iframe title=\"Navigating Conflict with Skillful Communication: A Dialogue with Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar\" width=\"800\" height=\"450\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/beLX8X_zgEE?feature=oembed\" frameborder=\"0\" allow=\"accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture; web-share\" referrerpolicy=\"strict-origin-when-cross-origin\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/p>\n<p class=\"lead\">Communication is not always easy when there is a conflict. Yet, it is the only way to arrive at a resolution. Owing to his diverse experience in conflict resolution, Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar was invited by Ohio State University for an interaction on navigating conflicts with communication. Dr. Aaron Yarmel, Associate Director of OSU Center for Ethics &amp; Human Values interacted with Gurudev on the topic.<\/p>\n<h2>Here are five takeaways from the interaction.<\/h2>\n<h3>Do away with prejudice<\/h3>\n<p>Gurudev shared the first pre-requisite of dialogue: overcoming prejudices. \u201cCommunication cannot happen when there is prejudice. We have to see that we are all the same. We are all human beings. All kinds of prejudices need to be done away with, be it racial prejudice, gender prejudice, generation prejudice, or religious prejudice,\u201d said Gurudev. Otherwise, you speak from somewhere and the other party receives from somewhere else.<\/p>\n<h3>Don\u2019t run away from conflict, become a bridge<\/h3>\n<p>Dr. Yaramel pointed out the general reactions of people to conflicts. Either people are too afraid to raise objections and try to hide beneath superficial unity or people drive themselves to conflict and miss opportunities to collaborate. \u201cWhat is the right way to engage in communication when there is a conflict,\u201d asked Dr. Yaramel. To which Gurudev replied, \u201cNever shy away from conflicts and speaking the truth.\u201d He added, \u201cYou don\u2019t need to be rude to speak the truth.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Gurudev also shared a personal anecdote. When he met FARC members in Cuba for a peace dialogue, he told them that he understood their point of view. \u201cI know you are not having fun in the jungle,\u201d he said. \u201cI just don\u2019t approve of your path. I am for social justice,\u201d he added. He recounted that they agreed and hence, declared a unilateral ceasefire. In one month, the peace process began which seemed impossible a few months ago and the former militant group formed a political party. \u201cWhen you give them confidence, and you don\u2019t take any sides, you become a bridge,\u201d concluded Gurudev.<\/p>\n<h3>Create a conducive atmosphere with breathwork, patience &amp; perseverance<\/h3>\n<p>You can create an atmosphere of resolution by equipping both parties with tools and techniques to de-stress and keep calm. Coming back to commonalities and keeping aside matters that create conflict is another way to create a conducive atmosphere. Most importantly, ask them what is their solution. Gurudev shared an anecdote, \u201cThe Ram temple Bhoomi in India was a 500-year-old conflict. There were 25 parties that had been fighting for generations. I asked them if this is not solved do we want to continue the fight between Muslims and Hindus over this land. 1200 imams agreed to take a 5-acre place outside the complex. Not one incidence of violence happened after that.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>He spoke about a simple conflict at home. \u201cThe husband wants to go to Florida and the wife wants to go to Canada. Sit together and look for a commonality. Sensible people are always ready for a give and take. They only want an assurance that their voice is heard,\u201d he concluded.<\/p>\n<h3>Be sincere, sensible &amp; sensitive<\/h3>\n<p>Conflict resolution needs sincerity on both sides. Peace is not being complacent. You don\u2019t need to give up your point of view to find a resolution. Likewise, dynamism and action need not be furious or violent. We are caught between these extremes. That is why sensibility and sensitivity are needed. If you are only sensitive, your dialogue will be ruined. If you are only speaking from your head, conflict will escalate.<\/p>\n<h3>Watch out for perceived threat<\/h3>\n<p>We cannot be too judgemental before we start a dialogue. Even the worst criminal is given a lawyer to defend themselves. We have to recognize that everyone has a heart. Our mind clings to the negative more. If you are given ten compliments and one insult. What will you remember? Gurudev shared an anecdote, \u201cAn 80-year-old couple came to me and told me that they are getting a divorce. They said they never got along well. That is when I asked them how many good days have you had. That is when they realized that the conflict only arose during the past year.\u201d We should pay attention to our minds. It has a tendency to chew on the negative. Instead, take a break from this tendency. Look why someone is talking the way they are talking. You will find there is a perceived threat which may not be real. This is what is happening between Russia and Ukraine. There is a perceived threat. What happened in Iraq? Wars have not achieved anything in the world. No war has done any good to the world.<\/p>\n<h2>Gurudev also took questions from students in the audience. Here is an excerpt.<\/h2>\n<ul id=\"qna-accordion\" class=\"panel-group\" role=\"tablist\" aria-multiselectable=\"true\">\n<li class=\"panel panel-default\">\n<div id=\"ques-1\" class=\"panel-heading\" role=\"tab\">\n<h3><a class=\"collapsed\" role=\"button\" href=\"#ans-1\" data-toggle=\"collapse\" data-parent=\"#accordion\" aria-expanded=\"false\" aria-controls=\"ans-1\">Q: How do you stay sensible if you feel like you are under threat? Or do you know the group that you are part of can be harmed?<\/a><span class=\"glyphicon glyphicon-plus\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<div id=\"ans-1\" class=\"panel-collapse collapse\" role=\"tabpanel\" aria-labelledby=\"ques-1\">\n<div class=\"panel-body\">\n<p>Gurudev: It does not mean dropping your defense system. You should have your defenses. But at the same time, don\u2019t see others through the same glasses. There are people with whom you have to be careful. I would say that you should see those who are harming others as people who are unwell. You don\u2019t get angry with them. You only try to find out how you can help them.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/li>\n<li class=\"panel panel-default\">\n<div id=\"ques-2\" class=\"panel-heading\" role=\"tab\">\n<h3><a class=\"collapsed\" role=\"button\" href=\"#ans-2\" data-toggle=\"collapse\" data-parent=\"#accordion\" aria-expanded=\"false\" aria-controls=\"ans-2\">Q: How to communicate when somebody else perceives you as a threat?<\/a><span class=\"glyphicon glyphicon-plus\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><\/span><\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<div id=\"ans-2\" class=\"panel-collapse collapse\" role=\"tabpanel\" aria-labelledby=\"ques-2\">\n<div class=\"panel-body\">\n<p>Gurudev: First, you tell them directly. If that does not work, find a mediator whom both of you trust. A mediator helps ease the tension.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar was invited by Ohio State University for an interaction on \u00abNavigating Conflict with Skillful Communication\u00bb with Dr. Aaron Yarmel, Associate Director of OSU Center for Ethics &amp; Human Values.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":30951,"parent":0,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"work-categories":[234],"content-tags":[247],"class_list":["post-30950","work","type-work","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","work-categories-leadership-ethics","content-tags-activities"],"acf":[],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- 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